Only Children

only child?

  • Only Child is ME

    Votes: 10 20.0%
  • 1 sibling

    Votes: 22 44.0%
  • 2 siblings

    Votes: 14 28.0%
  • 2 siblings and i'm the middle 1 like hitler and napoleon

    Votes: 2 4.0%
  • 3 or more brothers and sisters

    Votes: 2 4.0%
  • my mum says she found me under a mulberry bush

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    50

zhao

there are no accidents
so far only a couple of the people I had in mind as only children have actually posted on here.
name names!
To be honest what I was thinking was that most of the really music/media obsessed people I know are only children. They also have a sense of being special/having a special destiny a lot of the time, ime. Which can be a good thing
the music and media of course makes sense: so much time spent alone growing up. i remembe drawing for hours and hours on end by myself, reading obsessively from age 4 to 7 (wore glasses by then), and just always playing by myself... yes "can" be a good thing...;) in addition to the self absorption and sense of entitlement and insularity and emotional detachment and simultaneous neediness and "lack of understanding of how people work" (thanks Luka!)... and some or all of these characteristics is presumby how nomad knows this:
Zhao is an only child.
product of the "1 child rule" of 1970s China... and even now. i was reading that the policy is regarded internationally as a huge success, as the population growth rate in China has ONLY been like 10 million annually (i exaggerate but it was some huge number).
debating whether or not to have a second child, myself.
would be amazing but i don't think i will have one... 1: terrified of becoming my father and 2: the usual over population and number of unwanted children in the world issues. my girlfriend has a daughter, so it's kind of like adoption like i always wanted to, but without the pain in the ass procedures.
 

luka

Well-known member
er yeah sorry zhao
i have phases of being very expansive and friendly and then ones of being a horrible bastard. my latest project is trying to be more nice.
 

nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
product of the "1 child rule" of 1970s China... and even now. i was reading that the policy is regarded internationally as a huge success, as the population growth rate in China has ONLY been like 10 million annually (i exaggerate but it was some huge number).

This reminds me, I was going to say before, when someone asked for "objective" rather than subjective measures of favoritism:

In all countries where they've instituted population controls and two-children limits, "social disequilibrium" in the form of drastic female shortages have soon followed. In countries like China and India, female fetuses are routinely aborted (basically on sight, as soon as ultrasounds confirm that they are female--you can walk into the next room and get it terminated), orphanages are full of female children, etc. etc.

A lot of people think this factor helped usher in a few revolutions. Tense 18-35 men = civil unrest.
 

nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
For the record, I'm not saying pop controls or abortions are bad, just that any time they get instituted on a large scale, male children get favored over females, which says something about economics, politics, social dynamics, and whose life/traits humans tend to value more.
 

polystyle

Well-known member
"would you like blended or unblended ? "

To reply a bit to Nomado, re: 'blended' families.
Our's never blended -it was like oil and water, familial layers smooshed together on what looked like more a whim then a plan.
We would have been much better off if Dad hadn't wanted to get remarried so quickly -
and the other women we was dating were much nicer, hotter and cooler.
Well, I got three identikit step brothers and younger step sister added to our three brood.
Totally mismatched in almost every way ...
Mother died early , I was 6 or 7 -to the earlier point made by MrSloane - it is quite different having already gone through some of that 'death' stuff.
Now my wife and some friends are dealing with the 'taking care of parent's' thing -
after only dealing with the thought of it and from a distance !

By now all sorted - Step mum passed after 9/11,
Dad has new British girlfriend photog who used to boss transport in Africa.
And so all is peaceful ...
;)
 

4linehaiku

Repetitive
Well if it helps your theory you'll be pleased to hear I'm an only child. Would probably fit into the music obsessed subset as well, I'm just one big walking cliche I suppose.

Never got the sibling jealousy thing though (the fact other people have them, rather than people being jealous of theirs). Possible interactions with siblings seem to range from 'really good friends who you have known forever' which I already have, to 'weird people you don't like or get on with but are stuck with anyway' which I obviously don't want. If it does offer some particularity unique experience then I have no idea what I missing, so I can't really be jealous of that either.

Not sure how well I fit the other usual only-child stereotypes. Self-analysis on this sort of thing doesn't tend to be very revealing does it?
 

nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
I just realized something. Every roommate I've ever had was an only child, from undergrad on up, including my current one. Even the ones I lived with in the 'real world,' in every apartment I've ever had. (Excluding any cohabitating partners.)

Since some of them were (semi-)randomly assigned, it's partially coincidence. But I'm guessing that I think about 'only children' in a certain light because I have a lot of experience living with them.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
In all countries where they've instituted population controls and two-children limits, "social disequilibrium" in the form of drastic female shortages have soon followed. In countries like China and India, female fetuses are routinely aborted (basically on sight, as soon as ultrasounds confirm that they are female--you can walk into the next room and get it terminated), orphanages are full of female children, etc. etc.

i'm all for starting with the extermination of male fetuses.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
Dad has new British girlfriend photog who used to boss transport in Africa.

my ex's mom was like 67 years old, and has a lovelife more exciting than ours. at one point she had 2 or 3 boyfriends at the same time, including a japanese doctor man who was married, who she was trying to convince to divorce. between all of them every other month she was going on a cruise or some such.

pretty inspiring really.
 

CHAOTROPIC

on account
I'm a twin, born on my father's birthday. He couldn't be more different than me. Big, fat, blond, married dyspraxic lawyer with aspergers. If I wasn't a twin I'd swear I was adopted.
 

poetix

we murder to dissect
With respect to birthdays and school years, my late October birthday made me one of the oldest in my primary school year, but skipping the final year of primary school and going to secondary a year early made me the second-youngest in my year (the youngest had done the same thing). I started university aged 17, had my 18th birthday party a few weeks into my first term...
 

swears

preppy-kei
I was the oldest kid in my school year at primary and secondary. Still a shortarse though. But the funny thing about school years is that someone only a few weeks older than me would still be a "year above" and noticeably more grown up.
 
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CHAOTROPIC

on account
Mono or dizygotic?

Non-identical. Cesarian, but I was pulled out last, so I'm the youngest. Being a twin is weird ... we didn't do the 'secret language' thing but we were close enough to have our own world, etc. Shared everything until we were about 13 & barely spoken since.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Elder of two. Got a brother 2.5 years younger (2 years below me at school). I think big-ish gaps between kids probably make things easier for the parents - less rivalry as they grow up, and often the older one can help take care of the younger one a bit, or at least not be so much of an attention-drain. With a gap of only a couple of years you've got to suddenly got to look after a newborn as well as a toddler. :confused:
 

nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
Non-identical. Cesarian, but I was pulled out last, so I'm the youngest. Being a twin is weird ... we didn't do the 'secret language' thing but we were close enough to have our own world, etc. Shared everything until we were about 13 & barely spoken since.

Yeah they're pretty different I've heard, non-identical versus identical...

There are identical twins in my family, which is extra incentive not to have kids, since that raises your chances of having them yourself-- if there's anything scarier than having one kid, it's two at once who are the same age.
 

Lichen

Well-known member
There are identical twins in my family, which is extra incentive not to have kids

I'm not sure this has a bearing on whether you'd have twins. Non-identical twins has a genetic link, but I don't think identical ones do.
 

3 Body No Problem

Well-known member
i'm all for starting with the extermination of male fetuses.

Great idea, we should aim to achieve a 1:4 male to female ratio. It would be a feminist's dream: women working in all jobs, including all top jobs. Men could form harems and bang hot girls left right and center without ever having to endure monogamy.

Almost all my friends are eldest children with > 1 sibling. As am I. Why?
 
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