How the World Sees England

Stuntrock

Active member
England? That country whose latest two national football team coaches came from Sweden and Italy?

My favorite things about england : 2000 AD, Alan Moore, A Guy Called Gerald, Autechre, Coil, Donald Cammell, Seefeel, Pram, Nurse With Wound, Trevor Wishart, Judge Dredd, Kipling, Ballard, Nic Roeg, Hitchcock, Peter Milligan, Joe Ahearne, Cantona, Wire, Simon Pegg...
 

Mr. Tea

Shub-Niggurath, Please
Roxy Music, Jonathon Meades, Peep Show, Gilbert and George, Brian Blessed, Viv and Malcolm (R.I.P.), Charles Darwin, Grace Jones, self-deprecation, sarcasm, atheism, rainy barbeques, University Challenge, real ale, pubs, Worcestershire sauce, proper bacon, proper tea, cheddar cheese, curry, wild blackberries, vintage Jags, megalithic monuments, David Attenborough, Stewart Lee, Simon Munnery, Chris Morris, Aphex Twin.
 
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craner

Beast of Burden
Inventive solutions for keeping out of the rain. Like railway carriages and umbrellas. That's what the English are best at.
 

grizzleb

Well-known member
Roxy Music, Jonathon Meades, Peep Show, Gilbert and George, Charles Darwin, Grace Jones, self-deprecation, sarcasm, atheism, rainy barbeques, University Challenge, real ale, pubs, Worcestershire sauce, proper bacon, proper tea, cheddar cheese, vintage Jags, megalithic monuments, David Attenborough, Stewart Lee, Simon Munnery, Chris Morris, Aphex Twin.
Glad to see Tea giving a bit of Meades love. His documentaries are such a step away from the formulaic and mundane effluent that is presented to us in 99% of such TV. You read any of his novels? I've got one sitting here waiting to go when I've finished some others. Sounds pretty good from reviews/blurb but we'll need to see.

Oh, add Adam Curtis to that list too.
 

Sick Boy

All about pride and egos
As an english ex-pat, when I think of England I think of: builder's tea, pies, breakfast, dark beer and K Cider, London, squats, Indian take-away, baked beans, racist nans, wet bricks, round-abouts, little cars that all look the same, trains, Fruit Pastilles, JD Sports, juice concentrate, back gardens with ponds in them, door knockers and post flaps, crisps in pubs (esp. walker's cheese and onion), pirate radio, documentaries on prime time television, the news being eternally about missing children, "lemonade", sparkling or still, walk left stand right, please put your hood down sir, and people enjoying rocky beaches on cloudy, cold days.
 
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D

droid

Guest
War, empire, imperialism and occupation, the arms trade, near-genocide... pretty much the same as most major European powers.
 

bruno

est malade
for countries such as mine, chile, with little british involvement beyond historical commercial ties and the odd pirate attack, we are so removed from britain that it does not exist at all in daily life. mr. tea's list would draw a blank stare. david attenborough's voice would be replaced by that of an american actor. what is known? the english drink tea, and are miserable. england and britain are interchangeable, most would not know the difference. scotland and ireland? bagpipes and hobbits. you have a royal family, susan boyle, harry potter, the beatles and are engaged in pointless wars alongside america. we rooted for you against argentina. readers would recognise agatha christie and jane austen. some similarities: we excel at gazing at our navels, are not entirely comfortable with our neighbours, but we trade with them and welcome them with open arms. we long for a golden past of simple chilean values, but this little haven has long come under the spell of the outside world, including america. i suspect this situation is repeated elsewhere on this tiny globe.
 

Mr. Tea

Shub-Niggurath, Please
You make a pretty drinkable shiraz. I think that's worth mentioning.

Susan Boyle but no Attenborough. Oh dear. :(
 

bruno

est malade
the wine can be quite wonderful, de martino and casa lapostolle come to mind but there are several young wineries. the de martino carménère is very good and economical.

yes, it's a shame about attenborough, i cringe when i see bbc docs on sale here narrated by oprah and so on, but there is always amazon.
 
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crackerjack

Well-known member
I can never find this on YouTube, but dialogue from a favourite Likely Lads clip, in which returning squaddie Terry runs his thumb over the world.
"I bet we could go right round the world and you'd have a pat response ready."
"I've travelled man, I've seen a bit of the world now you know."
"What do you think of Koreans, for instance?"
"Not to be trusted. Cruel people. Much the same as all Orientals."
"That's a third of the world's population dismissed in a phrase. Russians?"
"Sinister."
"Egyptians?"
"Cowardly."
"Oh? I thought you might have saved that for Italians."
"No, no, they're greasy aren't they? Not as greasy as the French mind."
"Germans?"
"Arrogant."
"Spaniards?"
"Lazy."
"Danes?"
"Pornographic."
"Well that's just about everyone. Oh, Americans?"
"Well, they're flash aren't they?"
"So it's just down to the British is it?"
"Well, I haven't got much time for the Irish or the Welsh, and the Scots are worse than the Koreans."
"And you never could stand Southerners."
"To tell you the truth I don't like anybody much outside this town. And there's a lot of families in our street I can't stand either. Come to think of it I don't even like the people next door."
"I see, so from the distant blue Pacific through the barren wastes of Manchuria, to 127 Inkerman Terrace, you can't abide anyone."
 
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