Where Toxic Masculinity meets Manlove

Simon silverdollarcircle

Well-known member
When either gender is having a go at performatively acting out the expectations / stereotypes of that gender, though , there is nothing worse.

Stag do's = hell.

Holidays with the lads / lads on tour = hell.

Girls nights out - never been on one obvs but looks like hell.

So I guess what I'm saying is male company is ok as long as it's not identifying consciously as being male company. As long as it's not core to its being.
 

Simon silverdollarcircle

Well-known member
There's this thing that's quite common near us of men in very mixed aged groups on the lash. Like they'll be twenty year olds with some 50 year olds. Sometimes Stag do's I guess but not always. Something intrinsically nefarious about these lads. Bonded by nothing but a love of the sesh. No common references, perspectives, lifestyles except a love of getting hammered.

I realise that dissensus night out would look exactly like that tho. John Eden corrupting bright eyed American millennials with pub gak
 

Simon silverdollarcircle

Well-known member
During the first lockdown I met up with some of my best mates and we realised that after 10 years of knowing each other it was the very first time that we'd met up without booze/drugs. It was nice but we've never done it since.
 

luka

Well-known member
even if you share something in common, eg, me and craner like poetry and being fey aesthetes, ok fine, its something in common
but we have never talked about books or the arts or ideas or whatever once, no way, gross, we just get wankered, heads down, serious speed drinking till blackout.
 

version

Warehouse Operative
very visible performative "being a complete knob for clicks" type stuff
Have you seen that bloke on Twitter who insists on eating everything raw? Supposedly his family have begged him to stop and he's suffering from chronic diarrhea, but he refuses to back down and keeps posting photos of these meals consisting of raw meat, eggs etc.
 

linebaugh

Well-known member
Girls nights out - never been on one obvs but looks like hell.
was out with a buddy last night and we got so fucked that we had to leave the bar and walk it off downtown, ended up doing alot of freakish glassy eyed staring into store fronts, bars and etc. when we made it back to the bar a girls night out had arrived while we were gone. at one point an older woman not a part of the group got up and joined them dancing when a blondie song came on.
 

linebaugh

Well-known member
we determined theres no better person to be than a woman at a girls night or a 13 year old boy in a bike/scooter gang. complete liberation
 

version

Warehouse Operative
Whenever I've been out with big groups of men, I've always ended up observing from the sidelines as they're doing handstands on bar stools, using scaffolding as monkey bars or chanting that a member of the group's a wanker. I remember being on a train with like twenty guys, one of them going for a piss and the rest of them forcing the door open whilst he was in there and hurling abuse at him. It was kind of funny, but I was also very conscious of both how much I'd hate to be the target and how obnoxious and intimidating the whole scene would appear to anyone else who might have to get on the train with us.
 

linebaugh

Well-known member
you need to go out with fey aesthetes verge theres whole fields of masculine bonding youre missing out on
 

version

Warehouse Operative
you need to go out with fey aesthetes verge theres whole fields of masculine bonding youre missing out on
One of my best friends and more or less the only person I can talk to irl about books, films and whatnot is actually one of the worst, most laddish drunks I've ever met. A proper "rip your shirt off and start smashing stuff, chanting, singing etc" drunk.
 

linebaugh

Well-known member
One of my best friends and more or less the only person I can talk to irl about books, films and whatnot is actually one of the worst, most laddish drunks I've ever met. A proper "rip your shirt off and start smashing stuff, chanting, singing etc" drunk.
I thought youd never met luke?
 
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