Olympics

[3 Body No Problem]

not having your own anti-doping agency.

Nail on head. Suddenly all the top runners come from poor developing countries.

Apparently Bolt's best 100m time only a year ago was a lame 10.03!

 

[crackerjack]

Jamaica have now won 7 medals, all of them in the sprints, including two world records. If the tables were weighted for event prestige and individual performance, they'd be in the top 3.

 

[mos dan]

weighted for event prestige

and also weighted for 'event watchability', which automatically rules out all our sailing golds, jesus.

 

[Mr. Tea]

Right then, you bunch of crap-event nay-sayers, check out this list of discontinued Olympic sports:

http://www.topendsports.com/events/discontinued/list.htm

My favourites include motor boating, polo, equestrian highjump, dueling pistols ("[which] required competitors to shoot at mannequins dressed in frock coats. There was a bull's eye on the dummy's throat."), a weight-tossing competition involving a 25-kg weight and, in 1896, a 100m freestyle for sailors - in which three Greek sailors, and no-one else, competed. No prizes for guessing which country hosted the games that year...

 

[nochexxx]

glue sniffing table tennis players

i love this story.

 

[Sinko]

bit daft to be accusing Bolt of being a dope cheat already. he ran that 10.03 time in his first ever competitive 100m, and his 200m time was under 20 seconds when he was only 17! so it's not like he's just become phenomenal in the past 6 months or so. he also doesn't particularly seem/look like a drug cheat, all the drugs useful for sprinting turn you into a hulking, aggressive mess - he looked more like he'd just had a couple of beers and spliff before the 100m and he is still quite gangly. his physique just doesn't indicate muscle-building drug use (indeed doping could well have an adverse effect on him). and these "developing nations" have a great history of sprinting, but historically the best Jamaican born sprinters, for example, have always been poached (Ben Johnson, Linford Christie...who ironically WERE caught doping once they left JA).

 

[hucks]

these "developing nations" have a great history of sprinting, but historically the best Jamaican born sprinters, for example, have always been poached (Ben Johnson, Linford Christie...who ironically WERE caught doping once they left JA).

Plus isn't it the developed countries who have the worst records for doping? Soviet Union, E Germany, Balco in the States. Pricey business, comprehensive drug cheating programmes

 

[crackerjack]

bit daft to be accusing Bolt of being a dope cheat already.

Just to be clear, I didn't. But given that every male (and most female) winner of 100m since 84 onwards (excl. Donovan Bailey) has been guilty (or strongly suspected, in Greene's case) of doping, it would be pollyannaish not to even admit the possibility.

But I dunno - he's been tested to fuck at the Games. To what extent would drugs taken, say, 3 months ago benefit him now?

 

[hucks]

They've swapped it round. Here's the 2004 table - with China second thanks to more golds, despite winning 30 fewer than the Russians over all.

http://asp.usatoday.com/sports/olympics/athens/medals.aspx

tacky fuckers

Now evidently ranking by number of bronze medals (at the end of this clip)

 

[mos dan]

given that every male (and most female) winner of 100m since 84 onwards (excl. Donovan Bailey) has been guilty (or strongly suspected, in Greene's case) of doping

jesus christ, you've just reminded me why i completely lost faith and interest in athletics. i mean isn't it utterly devoid of integrity, if this is the case? is it not beyond rehibilitation? i guess maybe not if tests are proven to be rigorous enough? still though, what a sour taste that leaves.

on a less whingey note, that link is absolutely SUPERB, mr tea. really hilarious. i will be sharing the 100m freestyle for sailors with a number of people

 

[IdleRich]

"bit daft to be accusing Bolt of being a dope cheat already. he ran that 10.03 time in his first ever competitive 100m, and his 200m time was under 20 seconds when he was only 17! so it's not like he's just become phenomenal in the past 6 months or so."

Yeah, apparently he was as quick at seventeen as Johnson was at twenty. He's been tested to fuck as well so it seems unlikely - unless they've found another drug that can't be traced of course....

Anyway, how come no one is talking about our seventeenth gold medal?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/olympics/sailing/7571898.stm

Plus, what happened to the BMX (BMfuckingX!), shouldn't we have a gold in that by now?

Also, what's going on with these designated protest zones? Apparently there have been seventy-seven applications to protest but they've all been turned down (mostly because they've been amicably sorted out - except for the two old ladies who've been arrested for complaining about their houses beeing demolished) - it's almost as though the zones are some kind of smokescreen to mendaciously present a less authoritarian side of China.

 

[IdleRich]

"Plus, what happened to the BMX (BMfuckingX!), shouldn't we have a gold in that by now?"

No need to panic, it was delayed for twenty-four hours by the weather.

 

[crackerjack]

Equestrian drug scandal. Those aristos are rolling hardcore.

 

[IdleRich]

My friend sent me this which is quite interesting (although already out of date). Think he got it out of the Guardian. Some of the orderings seem a bit pointless to me - especially the number of athletes one, presumably that should be a funtion of the number of people in your country and if it's not I don't see why having a disproportionately low number of competitors should be a virtue. Unfortunately for USA today none seem to make the US come out top.

Great Britain are flying high but how do they fare when number of
athletes, GDP and population of the other top 20 nations are compared?

The medal table

G S B
1 China 45 14 20

2 United States 26 28 28

3 Great Britain 16 10 11

4 Russia 13 14 18

5 Australia 11 12 13

6 Germany 11 8 9

7 South Korea 8 10 6

8 Japan 8 6 9

9 Italy 6 7 7

10 Ukraine 5 5 8

11 France 4 12 14

12 The Netherlands 4 5 4

13 Jamaica 4 3 0

14 Romania 4 1 3

The points table: three for a gold, two for silver, one for bronze

1 China 183

2 United States 160

3 Russia 85

4 Great Britain 79

5 Australia 70

6 Germany 58

7 South Korea 50

8 France 50

9 Japan 45

10 Italy 39

11 Ukraine 33

12 The Netherlands 26

13 Canada 23

14 Spain 21

The athletes: Points divided by number in team

1 Jamaica 0.36

2 Kenya 0.36

3 China 0.29

4 Great Britain 0.25

5 The Netherlands 0.25

6 United States 0.25

7 Slovakia 0.20

8 South Korea 0.18

9 Russia 0.18

10 Australia 0.16

11 France 0.15

12 Romania 0.15

13 Germany 0.13

14 Ukraine 0.13

The GDP: points divided by GDP

1 China 0.0915

2 Kenya 0.0276

3 Ukraine 0.0170

4 Russia 0.0147

5 Jamaica 0.0050

6 USA 0.0036

7 Romania 0.0035

8 South Korea 0.0028

9 Poland 0.0022

10 Australia 0.0020

11 Great Britain 0.0019

12 Germany 0.0016

13 France 0.0014

14 Italy 0.0012

15 Japan 0.0012

16 Slovakia 0.0011

17 Spain 0.0008

18 Canada 0.0006

19 The Netherlands 0.0006

20 New Zealand 0.0006

The population: Millions per point
1 Jamaica 0.16

2 New Zealand 0.27

3 Australia 0.31

4 Slovakia 0.49

5 The Netherlands 0.63

6 Great Britain 0.77

7 South Korea 0.99

8 Ukraine 1.05

9 France 1.29

10 Romania 1.31

11 Germany 1.42

12 Canada 1.45

13 Italy 1.53

14 Russia 1.67

15 United States 1.91

16 Poland 2.12

17 Spain 2.15

18 Kenya 2.17

19 Japan 2.83

20 China 7.22

 

[crackerjack]

I fucking love the 4x100, only 4 from 6 finished the first heat, the Yanks are out.

Edit: and now so are the Brits. Wazzocks.

Edit 2: and so are the US women. Ha ha ha (I waited til ours got through this time)

 

[IdleRich]

"You'll be telling me you don't like the Grand National or really muddy football matches next."

I assume you're aware of this event?

http://www.swampsoccer.co.uk/

 

[crackerjack]

I assume you're aware of this event?

http://www.swampsoccer.co.uk/

I wasn't but I am now. Ace. What does Heid Bummer mean?

 

[IdleRich]

"Right then, you bunch of crap-event nay-sayers, check out this list of discontinued Olympic sports:"

I think that in the future dressage and synchronised diving will be seen as just as stupid as any of them. Tug of war is a far better sport than dressage. Imagine you're some 1500m runner who has dedicated their life to training to get to the olympics, pounding the track morning and night, sacrificing a social life, slaving away pushing your body to the limit for your shot at that elusive medal - then you see some sixty year old double-barrelled cunt on a horse sitting still while it walks around a bit quite slowly and he gets something that apparently is just as good as what you busted your guts for - I reckon you would feel a little peeved.

 

[crackerjack]

And now the Jamaicans have destroyed the 4x100 world record. Pleased for Asafa Powell, who looks to have been permanently exposed as a choker.

 

[Slothrop]

Ooh, good point, I'd forgotten about fighting sports.

Then again, boxing already has world championship title fights, doesn't it? Also, under rule 2, would you merge all the weight categories so basically only the really huge bastards would stand a chance?

On the showing at this games, boxing should probably be out under the "arbitrarily decided by judges" rule.

Also, having seen a bit of it, olympic taekwondo is one of the silliest combat sports ever. It seems to have about as much relation to actually fighting as thumb wars, although admittedly it looks more spectacular.