The french

[WashYourHands]

 

[WashYourHands]

 

[sus]

Lascaux, Carnac, Zidane; the weight of the occupied; the blood of their Caesar. Vercingetorix, Alesia; war after war, the layers accumulate—landscapes nightmarish, magestic, and gnarled. Geotrauma, hotspots, capers; a middlebrow Celt; support them in sport, against England—always.

No idea what any of these words mean but they're fantastic words

 

[WashYourHands]

Where’s your passport foo’

 

[sus]

Douai, Messines,
returning now to Marcke living
in the château of the occupied,
playing with the occupant,

Giving the owner a
pretense of power exercised in
kidnapped furniture and
walled-off wings.

Ricky accumulates trophies
in the foyer and
up the stairs, under the desk
of the stenographer discreetly
buttoning her collar.

 

[WashYourHands]

 

[sus]

Where’s your passport foo’

Being detained at the border by European police

 

[WashYourHands]

The French version

 

[WashYourHands]

Being detained at the border by European police

who are all alcoholics, no stress

 

[sus]

Douai, Messines,
returning now to Marcke living
in the château of the occupied,
playing with the occupant,

Giving the owner a
pretense of power exercised in
kidnapped furniture and
walled-off wings.

Ricky accumulates trophies
in the foyer and
up the stairs, under the desk
of the stenographer discreetly
buttoning her collar.

Critique this verse @luka gimme aural feedback the cadence the sound of the words the images I don't know how to tell good poetry from bad in any rigorous way

 

[WashYourHands]

Douai, Messines,
returning now to Marcke living
in the château of the occupied,
playing with the occupant,

Giving the owner a
pretense of power exercised in
kidnapped furniture and
walled-off wings.

Ricky accumulates trophies
in the foyer and
up the stairs, under the desk
of the stenographer discreetly
buttoning her collar.

 

[sus]

A luxury garden, French
symmetry far from
Tiergarten, thinks

Manfred on
hospitable grounds,
surrounded by stout walls and
slim paths, and the
paralyzing shyness

of von Richthofen.

 

[WashYourHands]

 

[WashYourHands]

 

[WashYourHands]

 

[sus]

Should I give my first son the name Lascaux, Carnac, or Zidane

Leaning towards Carnac

 

[sus]

@WashYourHands wanna visit the Carnac stones with me?

 

[version]

@WashYourHands wanna visit the Carnac stones with me?

 

[WashYourHands]

 

[woops]

A luxury garden, French
symmetry far from
Tiergarten, thinks

Manfred on
hospitable grounds,
surrounded by stout walls and
slim paths, and the
paralyzing shyness

of von Richthofen.

not bad