Shhhh are you crazy? Walls have ears Shaka, even here, even though most of this lot wouldn't know a tune if you rolled it up into a baseball bat and clubbed them to death with it but things can still get out, even from here. So do be careful strewing these priceless jewels so profligately even in front of this mindlessly oinking crowd...
Anyway, I checked the tune and, my first thought was that I was gonna fucking rinse it at 3am... but then, I thought "No! Rich, think about it, there is so much more to this tune" and, if I do say so myself, I was right, It's fucking perfect, you know how like the warm-up dj is often looking for a really specific kind of sound, something that can get under people's skin and give them a bit of a heads up... a little tug on the edges of the nerves, something saying "Hey, maybe you should just start to drift over here a bit, seems like I have a bit of feeling that we're on the cusp of something"? I think that's a big part of it, you don't want anything that is too dynamic, too pushy, anything that just gets involved too early and shoots its bolt like some spotty virgin trying desperately not to spaff... so its a real fine balance. Something with that hint thing going on, but without being too.... what's the word here... just... "too" I think.
And this definitely isn't "too" - I mean it's so... perhaps not the warm up guy, I don't know if it's really a warm up tune like that. It's more, before the warm up guy... sometimes they have some tunes just playing before the first dj gets there, and you need something else before those tunes too of course. Cos - probably this goes without saying, but just in case, I will say it anyway - for a perfect night, the staff need to be in a certain mood to get across the right vibe all the time and I think that this tune can help them... so I'm imagining this moment - once the staff are there and they have been gathered together in the antechamber before they come through to the club proper and they are all psyching themselves up, like sportsmen about to compete, just trying to get themselves into the mood, to get themselves ready for what's about to come.
The way to do it would be to have the doors open to let the staff through into the actual club and as they emerge into the main space, your tune is just finishing... cos there is a real specific mood that I would like the staff to be in and it's absolutely the opposite of the sound of this record so it could be like we have this playing and then the staff arrive, and after they've got in and have been there for like two minutes we could turn it off and they would all say "thank fuck that godawful dirge has finished I feel a bit more alive now".
Thanks so much for sending it anyway!
ps I haven't actually listened yet, but don't worry, I will.