London Marathon
- Thread starter craner
- Start date
D
droid
Guest
Train as much as possible - when is it?
Do at least a half-marathon, and preferably a 20 mile run beforehand (not on the same day). As many long distance runs as possible beforehand will help, but lay off heavy training 2 weeks in advance of the event.
Wear plasters over your nipples to stop them chafing and bleeding during the race (not a pretty sight).
Proper energy drinks work as well. Dont eat too much for a couple of days beforehand unless you wanna end up pulling a radcliffe at the side of the road - although a lot of Marathon runners shit and piss themselves during the race anyway...
Good luck!
Do at least a half-marathon, and preferably a 20 mile run beforehand (not on the same day). As many long distance runs as possible beforehand will help, but lay off heavy training 2 weeks in advance of the event.
Wear plasters over your nipples to stop them chafing and bleeding during the race (not a pretty sight).
Proper energy drinks work as well. Dont eat too much for a couple of days beforehand unless you wanna end up pulling a radcliffe at the side of the road - although a lot of Marathon runners shit and piss themselves during the race anyway...
Good luck!
"Seriously, Why Fucking Bother?" - those words will echo around your bobbing skull, as brain chaffs against dura mater, at mile 22.
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'Fraid not, according to friends who've run it themselves. Vaseline will be your friend.
D
droid
Guest
No Joke. Ive seen guys come in covered in blood.
jenks
thread death
This is the stuff;
http://www.bodyglide.com/
As for training - start with some 5-10 k runs. Do those until you are no longer coughing out your lungs.
Only then move up to half marathon distances.
Get some decent trainers and be prepared to use a lot of time training - you'll be pleased to run 10k in anything under 50 minutes unless you are well used to it. They reckon you need to run four times your distance every week to get the necessary legs.
You'll be forever eating to get enough carbs - fortunately you're already a long legged fly so you should find the actual act of running unproblematic.
Get swimming and cycling as well - cross training really improves fitness.
i think you should get Luka to do it with you - in a rhino suit.
http://www.bodyglide.com/
As for training - start with some 5-10 k runs. Do those until you are no longer coughing out your lungs.
Only then move up to half marathon distances.
Get some decent trainers and be prepared to use a lot of time training - you'll be pleased to run 10k in anything under 50 minutes unless you are well used to it. They reckon you need to run four times your distance every week to get the necessary legs.
You'll be forever eating to get enough carbs - fortunately you're already a long legged fly so you should find the actual act of running unproblematic.
Get swimming and cycling as well - cross training really improves fitness.
i think you should get Luka to do it with you - in a rhino suit.
craner
Beast of Burden
Another thing I've found out is that if your body loses enough energy in a marathon, it starts to digest itself!
So there you are, after 24 miles, nipples bleeding, limbs caked with diarrhoea, urine, vaseline, and then, after all that (which is, by the way, being filmed by the BBC*), you begin to self-cannibalise.
I'm having profound second thoughts about this marathon business.
On the up side, it's given me ideas for a series of films - Marathon Holocaust, Marathon Apocalypse, Zombie Marathon, I know What You Did Last Marathon, etc., etc. - that I think have potential.
* I assume it's an edited, propaganda version of the marathon that we actually get to see on our TV screens. To what nefarious end I know not.
So there you are, after 24 miles, nipples bleeding, limbs caked with diarrhoea, urine, vaseline, and then, after all that (which is, by the way, being filmed by the BBC*), you begin to self-cannibalise.
I'm having profound second thoughts about this marathon business.
On the up side, it's given me ideas for a series of films - Marathon Holocaust, Marathon Apocalypse, Zombie Marathon, I know What You Did Last Marathon, etc., etc. - that I think have potential.
* I assume it's an edited, propaganda version of the marathon that we actually get to see on our TV screens. To what nefarious end I know not.
SUNDAY MORNING OVERTIME PAY FOR SUPERANNUATED 3RD DIVISION SPORTS COMMENTATORS.
