My dad used to drink with Patrick McGoohan when the latter bought a pig farm near Totteridge Park. He also once heckled Enoch Powell at a union meeting in the 1960s.
My brother nicked the UK Decay singer's girlfriend at a gig, and used to hang around with one of Hank Marvin's sons (not the one who OD'd).
I used to see cultural commentator Bidisha at gigs and falling over on trains, back when she was just a fanzine writer. Speaking of cultural commentators, I've also met Dick Hebdige (complete fag ponce) and Stuart 'Policing the Crisis' Hall, we sat chatting at a bus stop in New Cross waiting for the 36 to turn up.
My mate Mark fucked the girl from the early 90s Sunkist adverts, I think her name was Sally?
I had a sordid long-running affair with the younger sister of a Muslim commentator who's just had a book published.
Ian Brown once told me I was in a completely drunken state in the reggae section of Out On The Floor, I didn't even know who it was til I left the shop and loads of nerds were milling around outside talking about him.
I once had a fag and a pint with Gary Clail.
My sister's ex-husband's dad, who was a money-grabbing quack, was exposed by News of the World in 1986 for flogging some sort of 'tapeworm treatment' to obese people. My other sister used to live in the same block in Kings X with Shane and Spider from the Pogues, and her mate Jerry used to help put on their early gigs.
I once saw the bloke who used to play Sanjay in Eastenders, he was walking through Soho and some drinkers were yelling "Gee-tah" at him, in spastic voices - he flipped out and started swearing and going 'Come on then!' - a sorry sight.
I met Nemesis the Warlock in a comic shop when I was 12.
Graeme Le Saux once gave me two fingers after I shouted abuse at him at a Spurs - Chelsea match.
My ex-flatmate Andy's model sister was once harrassed in Blackpool by Keith Harris (of 'Orville' fame), who ended up trying to kick down her hotel door and sobbing 'I love you' through the keyhole.